STUCK

DS_2013_08_12If you are a regular reader, you’ve probably noticed I haven’t written much in awhile. It’s not that I don’t have anything going on or anything to say, I have plenty. I’ve just been struggling lately. Stuck. I’ve been feeling depressed and feeling lost. Lost my outlet. Lost my voice. Lost myself.

I know having and caring for children requires sacrifices. And it’s a sacrifice I welcome, but I also think it’s important for me, and my family, for me to maintain a sense of self. I am a father. A stay-at-home father, but that’s not all I am. I’m finding it’s really difficult trying to find that balance.

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“DADDY, ARE YOU HAPPY?”

DS_2013_03_15aThe day to day routine of staying home can become monotonous at times.  Okay, more than “at times.” Every single day I can always count on Ellie protesting what to wear, what to eat and what to watch. She’ll say one thing, change her mind five minutes later, and then change back again. It’s amazing that in this chaos a “routine” even exists.

I consider myself to be a really easy-going, laid-back, patient person. But this dreary hectic day-to-day routine is really starting to wear on me, and I think Ellie is starting to notice too.

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FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Both my wife and I were fortunate that we grew up in houses where we sat down at the dinner table as a family to a home cooked meal from scratch 98% of the time. We both value meal time around the table and love food. Now that we have our own family, we want to give our kids the same experience we had and appreciated growing up.

Along with this experience we want to expose them to as many different varieties of food as we can. Different vegetables, spices, flavors, ethnic foods, etc. Not only do we want them to experience variety, but also know a little nutrition and not think “healthy = vegetables = yuck.” I’d rather them think, “Yay food! Food is good! We love food!” We want to instill in them a positive, healthy image about food.

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LIFE’S A PARADE

DS_2013_01_06aWhen I was growing up, it seemed like I just couldn’t wait. I was always looking forward to something. Always excited. I couldn’t wait for my birthday, for Halloween, for Christmas, for summer, to start high school, to graduate high school, to graduate college, to get a job, to get married, to have our own house. There was always something on the horizon. But after we got married it was like time stopped. For about six years nothing really changed. We went to work, we did tons of home improvement projects, we enjoyed each others company and we spent time with our family and friends. We were just coasting and going with the flow.

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CHRISTMAS BLEND

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I love being in a relationship with such variety. I love being exposed to Aya’s Japanese culture, and she loves being exposed to my American culture with my family’s Polish heritage. We try to raise Ellie, and now Chloe, with a nice mix of both. Blending holiday traditions between two different families is difficult enough, but it can be even more challenging when you’re blending traditions from two different countries with very different cultures.

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