CHEERS TO FIVE YEARS!

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*photo by Ksenija Savic Photography

This week I celebrate five years as a stay-at-home dad. FIVE! While five years might not be that big of a deal to some people, I found it worthy of a celebration. If I was at a professional job for five years, I’d want to acknowledge it. Just a simple lunch with a few coworkers is all I’d want.

I went into this job energetic, excited, and a bit naive. At the time, my paying job wasn’t very fulfilling. The economy had tanked and so did our industry. My company was handing out pay decreases instead of raises, and instead of doing my job I was archiving in the basement. I knew the inevitable was most likely going to happen and I nervously welcomed it. I wanted control of my every day, and of my life. I knew staying home to take care of Ellie and manage the house wasn’t going to be easy, but I was excited for the challenge and was ready to go all-in.

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THE UNEXPECTED

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Our day started out perfect. It was an absolute ideal day. Both girls actually ate their breakfast, got dressed, and brushed their teeth without incident. We did our morning school lesson and played. I even got to clean up the kitchen quietly before walking over to the park to enjoy the absolutely gorgeous weather we had. After a delicious lunch and a good nap from Chloe, we even went to the store, again without incident. No one fell asleep in the car and woke up grumpy. No one begged to listen to the same song over and over and over again. Just an all-around perfect day. But when the unexpected happens, it’s amazing how fast that perfect day can erode into a complete catastrophe.

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REST IN PEACE, NAPTIME

DS_2013_08_15_editDearly Beloved,

We are gathered here to celebrate the wonderful, yet short-lived duration of our dearly departed friend, Naptime.

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STUCK

DS_2013_08_12If you are a regular reader, you’ve probably noticed I haven’t written much in awhile. It’s not that I don’t have anything going on or anything to say, I have plenty. I’ve just been struggling lately. Stuck. I’ve been feeling depressed and feeling lost. Lost my outlet. Lost my voice. Lost myself.

I know having and caring for children requires sacrifices. And it’s a sacrifice I welcome, but I also think it’s important for me, and my family, for me to maintain a sense of self. I am a father. A stay-at-home father, but that’s not all I am. I’m finding it’s really difficult trying to find that balance.

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“DADDY, ARE YOU HAPPY?”

DS_2013_03_15aThe day to day routine of staying home can become monotonous at times.  Okay, more than “at times.” Every single day I can always count on Ellie protesting what to wear, what to eat and what to watch. She’ll say one thing, change her mind five minutes later, and then change back again. It’s amazing that in this chaos a “routine” even exists.

I consider myself to be a really easy-going, laid-back, patient person. But this dreary hectic day-to-day routine is really starting to wear on me, and I think Ellie is starting to notice too.

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