Matt Adventures, House Stuff, Outings

CONFESSIONS OF A GROCERY SHOPPER

I’ve been grocery shopping solo for the family for a while now.  I go Monday morning after I feed Ellie her breakfast.  It took me awhile to get my groove down, but I finally got it all situated.  Unless it’s before a predicted snowpocalypse, it’s pretty uneventful.  I have my own method to get me through the event, and I’d like to come clean on a few things.

Confession #1:
I hate the thought of other shoppers thinking I’m the stereotypical clueless guy that was sent to the store by his wife. That I’m wandering around the store without a clue of what to buy, or how to select produce. So when I am picking out fresh fruit or vegetables I pretend to know what I’m doing.  I pick things up, squeeze them, look underneath them and then put them back.  I repeat this two or three times before I make my final selection.  What am I looking for?  I have no idea.  I’m just putting on a show.  But I think everybody else is, too. As long as my thumb doesn’t go through anything, it seems alright to me. Continue reading “CONFESSIONS OF A GROCERY SHOPPER” →

Matt At Home, House Stuff

OH SHEET!

I’m trying to tackle as many chores during the week leaving the weekend open for family time. Which is why I’m on board with changing the sheets. I hate changing the sheets and making the bed. It is my number one chore I despise. I’ll happily scrub the toilets or clean the oven over changing the sheets. I’d rather polish the floors using a tooth brush than change the sheets. Just the thought of changing the sheets makes me want to act like Ellie when she’s throwing a tantrum. To just go limp, throw my head back and start whining with my face buried in the floor. I’d rather sleep on a bare mattress than change the sheets. Or on the couch. Or on our hardwood floors.

Continue reading “OH SHEET!” →

Matt At Home, Cooking, House Stuff, My Adventures, Outings

OPERATION SPICE

I was on a mission to find the perfect spice jars.  Since I’m the head chef these days, I have to look at the disorganized spice rack all the time and it’s not very user friendly.  They are all from different stores and brands with different labels.  Some have black caps, green caps, red caps, it’s awful.  So with the New Year here, I decided it was time to get a fresh start in my cabinets hopefully making my cooking experience more enjoyable and efficient. Continue reading “OPERATION SPICE” →

Matt Christmas, Family, Holidays, House Stuff, My Adventures

FREDDIE THE FROZEN CHRISTMAS FROG

To help battle the cold dry winter air, my dad came over to help me install a whole house humidifier on the furnace. Well exactly, I stood there and handed him tools. I’m a pretty handy guy, but dealing with the furnace was out of my league, so I played the role of assistant. As I was looking around the basement floor for a screw driver, I noticed something under the floor drain cover. It honestly looked like a mound of poop. Thinking this was odd, I took a closer look. It was pretty poorly lit by the floor drain and I was about to take the cover off when I noticed this “mound” had a nose. I jumped back as I wasn’t absolutely sure what this was. It was only able to determine that this was not something, but someone.  

Continue reading “FREDDIE THE FROZEN CHRISTMAS FROG” →
Matt Adventures, At Home, House Stuff, My Adventures

THE KIRBY

I was getting over a cold.  Ellie had barely napped so I was feeling extra exhausted and all I wanted to do was rest.  Finally at 5:00pm, Ellie quietly sat next to me eat her cheerios.  This always buys me a lot of time because her hand-eye coordination isn’t the greatest yet.  It takes her 5 tries to get the Cheerio in her mouth and then it keeps falling out.  Then she repeats.  So I was lying on the floor, half in a daze, Ellie with her snacks, and feeling relaxed.  And then someone knocked on the door.  Ah man…  The window was open too, they could probably see me lying there, I guess I had to get it.  But maybe it’s a kid selling candy bars, I could go for one of those, I thought.  I had to get it now.  I brought Ellie to intimidate whoever was there, to reverse pressure them into leaving.  Who wants to sell something to me when I have a fussy kid in my hands right?  I got to the door and there were two guys with ties.  He said something really fast as he handed me a thing of Bounty paper towel telling me it was free.  Kinda of confused as to what was actually happening, I said, “uh, ok.”  They got excited and said they would be right back.  I stood there stunned and very worried to what I just agreed to. Continue reading “THE KIRBY” →