Dear Bunnee,

This week, we lost your great grandmother.  To have four generations together in one family is a pretty incredible thing.  Mama never met my great grandparents, and lost my grandparents when I was pretty young.  I didn’t know them really well either.  You are so lucky to have both your grandparents in your life and be actively present too.  Not only are you going to have mama, papa, and your sister, but also Grandma, Gramps, Grandma-chan, and Gigi too!(and of course Uncle Pat and Aunt Kristen!)  We are all here to make sure you know that you are loved, and someone will always have your back.  We already all love you so much, and can’t wait to show you what that looks like.

xoxo Mama

In a most humbling, overwhelming, but also oddly peaceful way, we truly experienced the cycle of life this week. From celebrating life with friends and family, to mourning the loss of 92 years of life and wisdom, everything came full circle in one week.

While we were visiting friends over Memorial Day weekend is when Matt’s grandma slowly started the process of physically shutting down. The day she left us is when we had our 24 week prenatal appointment at the birth center. It was also the first time we brought Ellie with us, where she got to hear Bunnee’s heart beat; the beat of life. While talking with our midwife, she said something that couldn’t be truer; The process of birth and death are surprisingly similar in its physical nature. The body knows what to do.

Matt’s grandma’s body knew when it was time. It had held strong and healthy for 92 years and didn’t let her down. But it was time. When I was in labor with Ellie, I had the freedom to listen to my body where it knew what position to be in to be more comfortable, and how to work through the contractions and guide me through the process to birth my baby.  Not that either of them are easy to go through or to witness, but the body usually knows what it’s doing.

A good friend of mine who is also expecting recently experienced her grandmother’s death as well and told me how surreal it was to be witnessing death while creating life at the same time. It’s an odd dynamic, that’s for sure. But it’s also where we all start, and eventually end up.  It’s up to us to fill the in-betweens, and make every moment count.

Matt’s grandma died surrounded by family. At her funeral, people smiled, laughed, and spoke fondly of memories shared. It was a reminder of the depth and richness life has to offer.

It’s truly a cycle of life.  Each generation starts their own history, with hopes that their legacy continues.  Grandma Evelyn just past her’s onto Bunnee.

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